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I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
WMITC
Joined:
1/6/2008 1:03 pm
From Here
Posts: 23549
This morning, I went to the First Church of the Fundamentally Sane. Of course, I am the minister there -- the Most High Holy Right Reverend, as it were.

I didn't pray for anything specific, but I did hear a voice there. The voice was speaking to me.

The voice said this:

"Never give up, son. Never, ever give up. Play hard and play to win, and good things will come to those who believe. Do you believe?

"I believe," the voice continued. "I believe UConn will lose to both Cincinnati and South Florida because that's what UConn does -- get oh-so-close and then fold in the end.

"I believe Pittsburgh will lose to Cincinnati at the end of the season because that's what Pittsburgh does -- play Cincy at the end of the year and choke big time.

"And, oh yeah, I believe Bruce Irvin will sack Tino Sunseri 11 times to match his number and WVU will send the Panther pu$$ies back into the sewers of Oakland with a resounding victory on Black Friday, propelling the Mountaineers into a BCS game where they will be 84% underdogs and will shock the living **** out of some unsuspecting team from a "Big Boy" conference, once again saving the reputation of the Big East Conference.

"So that's why you should never give up, son. Thus sayeth the voice who speaketh to the Most High Holy Right Reverend of the First Church of the Fundamentally Sane.

"Oh, and P.S.," the voice added. "Pitt sucks now, Pitt has always sucked and Pitt will continue to suck until the end of time. Then, Pitt will suck after that.

"Amen."

Posted on: 11/23/2010 8:33 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Gettin' Schmitty
Joined:
1/25/2006 8:25 pm
From ohio via Panther WV
Posts: 9518
So you praid to the Patron Saint Jack St.Fleming or was it to his mom, Mary (don't know what her name was) Mother of the Voice.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:07 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Suspected Punter
Joined:
8/20/2009 9:52 am
From charleston,wv
Posts: 127
Quote:

SaneJane wrote:
This morning, I went to the First Church of the Fundamentally Sane. Of course, I am the minister there -- the Most High Holy Right Reverend, as it were.

I didn't pray for anything specific, but I did hear a voice there. The voice was speaking to me.

The voice said this:

"Never give up, son. Never, ever give up. Play hard and play to win, and good things will come to those who believe. Do you believe?

"I believe," the voice continued. "I believe UConn will lose to both Cincinnati and South Florida because that's what UConn does -- get oh-so-close and then fold in the end.

"I believe Pittsburgh will lose to Cincinnati at the end of the season because that's what Pittsburgh does -- play Cincy at the end of the year and choke big time.

"And, oh yeah, I believe Bruce Irvin will sack Tino Sunseri 11 times to match his number and WVU will send the Panther pu$$ies back into the sewers of Oakland with a resounding victory on Black Friday, propelling the Mountaineers into a BCS game where they will be 84% underdogs and will shock the living **** out of some unsuspecting team from a "Big Boy" conference, once again saving the reputation of the Big East Conference.

"So that's why you should never give up, son. Thus sayeth the voice who speaketh to the Most High Holy Right Reverend of the First Church of the Fundamentally Sane.

"Oh, and P.S.," the voice added. "Pitt sucks now, Pitt has always sucked and Pitt will continue to suck until the end of time. Then, Pitt will suck after that.

"Amen."
WARNING!!! the First Church of the Fundamentally Sane, where levity looms,will enter your body and change your life,and help you see everything for how it really is.

Good Post,Pastor SaneJane

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:11 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Here for the Beer
Joined:
9/8/2010 7:30 am
From morgantown WV
Posts: 471
I'll take that every day. I hope everything that voice said comes true.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:20 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Here for the Beer
Joined:
8/23/2008 2:19 am
From Just past Uranus
Posts: 324
What "The Voice" says is true, even if it doesn't actually happen. There is a Truth greater than Reality.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:27 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Makin' it Rain
Joined:
3/14/2008 1:20 pm
From N. Canton, Ohio
Posts: 2990
Quote:

SaneJane wrote:
"And, oh yeah, I believe Bruce Irvin will sack Tino Sunseri 11 times to match his number and WVU will send the Panther pu$$ies back into the sewers of Oakland with a resounding victory on Black Friday, propelling the Mountaineers into a BCS game where they will be 84% underdogs and will shock the living **** out of some unsuspecting team from a "Big Boy" conference, once again saving the reputation of the Big East Conference.

"Oh, and P.S.," the voice added. "Pitt sucks now, Pitt has always sucked and Pitt will continue to suck until the end of time. Then, Pitt will suck after that.

"Amen."


Amen Jane, Amen!

Somehow WVU will end up in the BCS game. Pitt, UConn will most definitely slide back down into thier little burrows and hide instead of stepping up.

It's 9:27 a.m. and Pitt is sucking right now!

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:27 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Gettin' Schmitty
Joined:
1/18/2008 2:39 pm
Posts: 8385
vox vobiscum

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:31 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Makin' it Rain
Joined:
9/14/2007 5:46 am
From NJ
Posts: 2809
Now to sacrifice a Husky and an Orange to the deity before the slaughter of the Panther.

Go Mountaineers!!


Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:34 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Pitt Hater
Joined:
12/20/2007 9:40 am
From Rockville, MD
Posts: 2457
Faith!

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:41 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Gettin' Schmitty
Joined:
1/18/2008 2:39 pm
Posts: 8385
Quote:

wooddash wrote:
Faith!


Hope and Charity (and their mom, Sophia)

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Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:51 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Here for the Beer
Joined:
9/19/2009 9:01 am
From Raleigh, NC via Gauley Bridge, WV
Posts: 333
Preach it, brother. AMEN!

Posted on: 11/23/2010 9:52 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Makin' it Rain
Joined:
10/24/2009 3:24 pm
From Cleveland
Posts: 3181
10:55am. sPitt still sucks.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 10:55 am
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Here for the Beer
Joined:
9/4/2008 4:06 pm
Posts: 355
Be healed by the voice of the Most High Holy Sane Right Reverend Jane! Be healed by his words spoken this most holy day high on the Mountain(eer)tops! Be healed of your past offensive woes, transgressions, and fumbles. Be healed of your...

.... Wait a minute. One final simple request to the Reverend: Could you put a request in with the Big Guy to please fully heal Noel's toe by the time the turkey is served on Thursday????

Posted on: 11/23/2010 1:16 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Gettin' Schmitty
Joined:
4/5/2008 11:37 am
From Madison, AL
Posts: 8384
GOD I"M GONNA CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh I can feel the rush all through my veins! Ouch! you damn offensive line, I'm gettin kilt. Now start blocking you bastages.......oh sorry preacher.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 1:21 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Grant Ave. Warrior
Joined:
7/5/2007 8:43 pm
From Mullens, WV
Posts: 832
Hey, maybe there is a church for me after all. What level of tithes do you require Most High Holy Right Reverend?

Posted on: 11/23/2010 3:39 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)

Joined:
7/27/2006 5:02 pm
From Alkol, Lincoln County
Posts: 24872
exorcise the demons!

Posted on: 11/23/2010 4:07 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Gettin' Schmitty
Joined:
1/18/2008 2:39 pm
Posts: 8385
Quote:

Redcloak wrote:
Hey, maybe there is a church for me after all. What level of tithes do you require Most High Holy Right Reverend?


Just make sure that you do gross and not net, or it doesn't count.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 4:18 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
WMITC
Joined:
1/6/2008 1:03 pm
From Here
Posts: 23549
Quote:

Redcloak wrote:
Hey, maybe there is a church for me after all. What level of tithes do you require Most High Holy Right Reverend?


Bow tithes, necktithes, thtring tithes, we don't dithcriminate.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 4:35 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
Grant Ave. Warrior
Joined:
7/5/2007 8:43 pm
From Mullens, WV
Posts: 832
Quote:

SaneJane wrote:
Quote:

Redcloak wrote:
Hey, maybe there is a church for me after all. What level of tithes do you require Most High Holy Right Reverend?


Bow tithes, necktithes, thtring tithes, we don't dithcriminate.


That's good cause I have a limited wardrobe. I wouldn't want to feel out of place.
I almost forgot: thanks for the advice Mounty, I might be in over my head here.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 7:14 pm
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Re: I went to church, too. (WARNING: Post contains levity.)
WMITC
Joined:
1/20/2006 11:13 am
From Eastern Panhandle, WV
Posts: 3915
And yea, verily, it came to pass that my faith and hope for the Mountaineer season was redeemed.

Although losing to Syracuse and UConn is still ridiculous.

Posted on: 11/23/2010 7:21 pm
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