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From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Staff Writer
Joined:
8/2/2006 10:54 pm
From DC
Posts: 414
Man with panties on face attempts to rob W.Va. store

Quote:
INWOOD, W.Va. (AP) — A thief covered his face with a pair of blue women’s underwear and used a pistol-shaped cigarette lighter in a botched robbery of a convenience store, police said.

“I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried,” State Police Sgt. T.C. Kearns told The Journal in Martinsburg.

The cashier at first thought it was a joke and refused to give the man any money, so he ran to a Jeep Cherokee and drove away at about 4 a.m. Wednesday, Kearns said.

A few minutes later, police stopped a vehicle matching that description and took two men into custody.

Police later charged Steven Clay Stephenson, 34, of Ranson in the convenience story robbery.

Kearns said police found a pistol-shaped lighter while searching Stephenson. The underwear was recovered nearby.

Stephenson is charged with nighttime burglary, attempted robber, first-offense driving under the influence, petit larceny and improper registration.

He was being held Thursday at the Eastern Regional Jail. The Berkeley County Prosecuting Attorney’s Office had no record of a defense attorney being assigned yet to represent Stephenson.


STORY LINK

Posted on: 5/11/2007 9:03 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
8/22/2006 1:26 pm
From Spartanburg, SC via Boone County WV
Posts: 2461
hahahaha. good lord, wait till he-who-must-not-be-named hears about this one. Hopefully, he'll go over the line on this one, and finally get banned. As for the crook. You think he used clean undies, or was he staring at some tire tracks the whole time. uhhh, talk about going over the line. gross. lol

Posted on: 5/11/2007 9:31 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Grant Ave. Warrior
Joined:
4/17/2007 3:47 pm
From Morgantown
Posts: 1170
Stephenson is charged with nighttime burglary, attempted robber, first-offense driving under the influence, petit larceny and improper registration.


i think that pretty much sums this up.

Posted on: 5/11/2007 10:25 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
10/19/2006 10:35 am
From Daytona, but my hearts in WV
Posts: 2281
Did you hear about the Michigan cop that made pot brownies with his wife, using "evidence". He called 911 and was asking about the Red Wings score, because he thought he was halucinating. I couldn't find the 911 call, but it was funny. When it pops up somewhere, I'll grab it.

Posted on: 5/11/2007 11:54 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Grant Ave. Warrior
Joined:
8/11/2006 11:14 pm
From Georgia
Posts: 998
Well, there goes my Plan B.

Posted on: 5/11/2007 2:39 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
7/10/2006 4:34 pm
From Morgantown
Posts: 1239
intense is the only word I can think of to describe that haha

Posted on: 5/11/2007 2:52 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
2/19/2007 3:02 pm
From St. Albans/Morgantown, WV
Posts: 2358
my Mike Gansey story needs to be under this thread lol.

Posted on: 5/11/2007 3:13 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
7/10/2006 4:34 pm
From Morgantown
Posts: 1239
you have a Mike Gansey story?

Posted on: 5/11/2007 3:19 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
2/19/2007 3:02 pm
From St. Albans/Morgantown, WV
Posts: 2358
To make it short and sweet,
he read me a suggestive card in Spencers. I loved it lmao.

Couldnt make that up lol.

Posted on: 5/11/2007 4:34 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
11/16/2006 1:07 am
From East Aurora, NY via Aurora, WV
Posts: 2530
He must have gotten some advice from Pac Man cause he was never going to get away with that one.

Posted on: 5/12/2007 8:28 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
2/19/2007 3:02 pm
From St. Albans/Morgantown, WV
Posts: 2358
maybe.... lmao

Posted on: 5/13/2007 9:41 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
7/10/2006 4:34 pm
From Morgantown
Posts: 1239
I just watched this story about the father of an accused sex offender. Some news reporter was doing a story on it or something and the father was walking by and flat out knocked the woman over.
http://news.aol.com/story/_a/alleged- ... its/n20070713051809990001

Posted on: 7/14/2007 6:37 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....

Joined:
7/27/2006 5:02 pm
From Alkol, Lincoln County
Posts: 24871
they finally caught the 'huntington fondler'.. he would sit in his car with the door open and do his business..

Posted on: 7/14/2007 7:21 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
11/16/2006 1:07 am
From East Aurora, NY via Aurora, WV
Posts: 2530
The headline alone to this story is pretty unbelievable...

Man Beaten With His Own Prosthetic Leg

http://www.wgrz.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=49520

Posted on: 7/15/2007 12:00 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....

Joined:
7/21/2006 8:41 pm
From Boone County, WV
Posts: 12965
If it isn't bad enough to have one leg..then be robbed. They use your own damn fake leg to beat you with.

Of course this is wrong..but I laughed when I saw the headline.

Posted on: 7/15/2007 12:10 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
2/19/2007 3:02 pm
From St. Albans/Morgantown, WV
Posts: 2358
"Huntington Fondler".....

When my friends mom was younger a guy called her over to his car and umm was doing...his business, I bet it was that guy.

Posted on: 7/15/2007 9:52 am
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
11/16/2006 1:07 am
From East Aurora, NY via Aurora, WV
Posts: 2530
"One-eyed gator pulls golfer into pond"

Apparently Chubbs Peterson isn't the only guy dumb enough to try to get his golf ball back from an alligator...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/06/26/gator.attack.ap/index.html

Posted on: 7/15/2007 8:14 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....

Joined:
7/21/2006 8:41 pm
From Boone County, WV
Posts: 12965
You think this dumbass would have read the sign and stayed out of that damn pond.

Of course the fact that this is a one-eyed alligator (and the fact that the paper had to report this fact) makes me laugh pretty hard.

Posted on: 7/15/2007 10:20 pm
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Open in new window Joe_Reporter: Hey Joe, you said back in October that you were going to jump over the Fonz statue in downtown Milkwaukee. So far there is no proof of you doing that.
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....
Pitt Hater
Joined:
2/19/2007 3:02 pm
From St. Albans/Morgantown, WV
Posts: 2358
Is a golfball really that important?

Posted on: 7/15/2007 11:45 pm
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Re: From the "You can't make this sh!t up files".....

Joined:
7/21/2006 8:41 pm
From Boone County, WV
Posts: 12965
I think that part in itself is quite hilarious. The headline could very well have been "Golfer loses an arm to a one eyed gator"

Posted on: 7/16/2007 8:16 pm
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